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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28900776">No More What-Ifs</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Prince_Enby/pseuds/Prince_Enby'>Prince_Enby</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>OMORI (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Gen, Guilt, OMORI Spoilers, Suicidal thoughts and actions, Suicide, basils tagged but hes. you know, hopeful ending? i think?, self-hate, that one ending where you dont save basil</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 09:08:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,267</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28900776</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Prince_Enby/pseuds/Prince_Enby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hero was tired. Tired of secrets, tired of anger, tired of guilt - but mostly, he was tired of losing people.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hero &amp; Sunny</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>217</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Quality Fics</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>No More What-Ifs</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>im posting this w/o preview on mobile so if it looks weird then tough shit (until i fix it LMAO)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Don’t look, Sunny. You…you shouldn’t have to see this.” Hero pleaded. Sunny walked right past him, ignoring his words, ignoring his tears. “You’re moving in the morning, Sunny, you’re supposed to be getting a new start. You shouldn’t…” </p><p>	Sunny slowly pushed open the door, face stony and blank. There was a strange look in his eye that put Hero on edge, made him follow closely behind with a hand on his shoulder. Their eyes fell on the body – Basil’s body – and Hero felt another wave of guilt and nausea hit him. Sunny, though, hardly seemed affected, apart from a slight narrowing of the eyes. Hero wanted to shield him from it, wanted to know what was on his mind, wanted to help him, wanted to not be a failure, wanted wanted wanted –</p><p>	“Coward.” </p><p>	Hero’s body froze. Sunny’s voice was cruel and icy, full of disdain and maybe even something close to pity. For a moment, Hero was scared he was talking to him, but no, Sunny’s gaze never strayed from Basil’s body. He…he couldn’t be talking about Basil…could he? Hero thought desperately.</p><p>	Unfortunately, his fears were proven correct when Sunny took a step forward, and said, “You just couldn’t handle it, could you? You couldn’t have at least waited one more day. Couldn’t bear to watch me leave.” Sunny crouched down next to the body, and if Hero wasn’t looking directly at him and saw his composure, he would’ve thought he was sneering. Sunny leaned down, and whispered, just loud enough for Hero to hear, “If that was the final straw, then you deserve this.”</p><p>	Hero saw red. “Sunny, what the hell?!”</p><p>	He didn’t so much as look at him, and just shrugged. “It’s true. After everything that happened, the fact that I’m moving is what did him in…it’s his own fault it upset this much, anyway. He really shouldn’t care so much. He should know better.”</p><p>	Deep breaths. </p><p>One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.</p><p>Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one.</p><p>If Hero looked closely, he could see Sunny’s hands shaking from where they rested on his knees. The boy seemed almost physically incapable of looking away from the body, except to glance at the bloody shears. He was affected, Hero thought, no matter how he tried to look. He was just…in shock. Yeah. </p><p>Another deep breath. Then, “What do you mean by that, Sunny?”</p><p>Sunny actually scoffed at that. “He shouldn’t care about me so much, especially not after I abandoned him for four years. He shouldn’t have stayed as long as he did four years ago. He shouldn’t have done what he did, he should’ve just left. He shouldn’t have thought I was important, not – “ A hitch in his voice, a crack in his armor. Hero could’ve sworn his eyes were wet, but then he looked down, “ – not more important than…Mari.” The ending was whispered, as if Sunny was scared to even say her name. Hero thought he was going to faint, because of course, of course this was related to Mari, of course it was all the same problem. Just when he was about to spiral, Sunny finally looked up, eyes wet and heartbroken, but most of all angry, and he spoke, voice full of venom, “<em>He shouldn’t have asked me to forgive him without even apologizing.</em>”</p><p>	Hero wanted to ask, What did Basil do? Why did he need to apologize? What the hell does this have to do with Mari?, but then Sunny reached across Basil for the bloody shears in his limp hands and his mind went white with a chorus of <em>nononononotagainnotagainpleaseno</em> as he near tackled Sunny to the ground in panic. He thought there might be a group at the doorway, probably worried over hearing their tussle, but Hero couldn’t bring himself to care when he was pinning too thin wrists to the ground with a knee on a too bony back. He tried not the think of the body right beside them.</p><p>	Sunny struggled barely for just a second before limp. Hero could feel just as well as he could hear his shaky breaths. “No,” He said, firm and afraid and desperate, “No.”</p><p>	“Please. Please let me do it. I can’t – “Sunny begged beneath him, tears springing up but still refusing to fall. He sounded broken, and it broke Hero to listen. “I can’t forgive him, Hero, please. I can’t even forgive him, how – how am I supposed to forgive myself if I can’t even forgive him? How am I just…just supposed to think he deserves this more than I do? I’m worse than him, Hero, I swear I’m worse than him. If he deserves to die then I do too. I d – “</p><p>	“Shut up!” Hero – yelled? Maybe. He could hear himself over the ringing in his ears and the loud thumping of his heart. “Just – shut up. No one here deserves to die, okay? No one. Not Basil, and not you. Okay? No one.”</p><p>	“You’re wrong.” </p><p>	“No, I’m not. I’m not losing anyone else tonight, Sunny, and nothing you say can –“</p><p>	“I killed Mari.”</p><p>	Hero froze. “…what?”</p><p>	“I said I killed Mari. She yelled at me for breaking my violin and I pushed her down the stairs. Let me go.”</p><p>	It was like all the air was sucked out the room. Hero felt cold and stiff, detached from his own body. Sunny had his head turned, looking at him from below. There was something tired and dead in his eyes, something that reached inside Hero and laid him bare. It saw his fear and his hate and his exhaustion. He looked so resigned, so expectant, and Hero knew letting go would be signing his death warrant.</p><p>	In that moment, Hero hated him. Hated him so viscerally he was tempted to get up, dust off his clothes, and leave the filthy murderer to die in a dark room next to the corpse of what he can now assume was his accomplice. The image was so sweet, so vivid, he could imagine clear as day the look of his body in a casket, and –</p><p>	He looked at the boy below him.</p><p>	The body would look just like Mari’s.</p><p>	And just like that, the hate evaporated, leaving Hero just…tired. Tired of being angry, tired of being sad, tired of not knowing and losing nights to the what-ifs. What if he saw the signs, what if he got home earlier, what if he could’ve got her to trust him more. </p><p>	What if it wasn’t a suicide. (It wasn’t.)</p><p>	What if it was her own fucking brother and his best friend. (It was.)</p><p>	What if the guilt drove <em>them</em> to suicide. (It did, it is.)</p><p>	What if he still didn’t have the full picture. (He didn’t.)</p><p>What if. (What if.)</p><p>He sighed, exhausted, and shook his head. “No, Sunny. Just…no.”</p><p>Sunny didn’t argue, just quietly said, “Okay.”</p><p>In the distance, Hero could hear sirens. They were getting closer and closer. He wasn’t sure what all they would do, Basil was dead, he could see that. But…he’ll use their arrival as a – a timer, maybe. Give himself until they came and gone to gather himself. He needed to get Kel and Aubrey home, ensure they were safe. Maybe he’d ask if Aubrey could spend the rest of the night with them, He didn’t want her to be alone right now. And after… afterwards, he and Sunny needed to have a very, very important talk.</p><p>He meant it when he said he wasn’t losing anyone else tonight.</p>
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